Share Your Struggles with Your Children

A parent’s love for their child is powerful and unyielding. My own daughter is not even two years old, yet I already know there is no limit to what I would do for her. As parents, we have so many hopes for our children’s future, what career they will pursue, hobbies we want to pass on, and relationships they will have. We also know the difficulty in letting our child figure something out on their own, knowing how much easier it would be to just do it for them or to give them the answers.
 
Yet we persevere, let our children explore new things, let them try to hold a cup of water with no lid, get dressed by themselves, pick a sport.
 
We train and guide them on how to deal with a tough teacher, a friend who was mean, their first breakup, how to make good decisions in life.
 

We hold fast to Proverbs 22:6, praying that our kids choose Jesus someday.

Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.

 
But all along the way, do we ever let our kids see our own struggles, witness how we deal adversity and how we go to God with our challenges? We so desperately want to preserve our children’s innocence as long as possible, but there will be a day when they will have to deal with an adult-level problem. If they haven’t been shown how to do that, their first instinct may not be to turn to Christ.
 

If you have children in junior high or high school, I can promise you that your kids know when something is wrong.

 
They may not know the details, but they can tell when something is going on – and they worry about it. I have previously worked as a camp counselor for 7 years and have been a youth group leader for over a year. Many of the prayer requests I hear from students are about their family or their parents. Instead of hiding everything from them in the hopes of protecting them, invite them in so they can see how you lean on Christ. They don’t need all the specifics (and it’s not always healthy for them to know every detail), but the more you try to hide, the more they will fill in with their own imaginations.
 

Pray for God’s discernment and be open as God leads.

 
Pray about it as a family, teach them how they can be helpful by praying and listening to God. Show them how you lean on Jesus even when nothing is going right, so when they find themselves in a similar situation, they too will run fiercely after Jesus.
 

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 says

These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

 
Let’s teach our children how to run to Christ in every situation by letting them see how we do it first. Let’s give them an example to follow when things in their own life seem out of control. By sharing our struggles, we have a prime opportunity to point them to Jesus.
 
Author: 

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Faith of the Next Generation

As my wife and I had our third of five children turn 30 this past week, it was an opportunity to stand back and say thank you God. We wonder aloud how the time passes so quickly! I mean, these five children were just learning to ride bikes, skip stones, climb trees and splash in the crick. In addition to watching our own children grow up, we now have the opportunity as grandparents to do the same with our grandchildren who are growing up as fast as our children did. Instilling faith in the next generation is a privilege and responsibility.
 
We pray all the time that we will be found faithful to have been used by God to have poured into the succeeding generations. When trials and tribulations come (which they will), we pray the next generation will choose Jesus and the principles of righteous living. In a world that competes nonstop for the hearts and minds of our children – and children’s children – with things that conflict with the Fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control), we need to be deliberate to not just talk about Godly living but model it too. Guess what… when we fail we need to talk about that too.
 
We want the faith of the next generation to be their own. We want their obedience to be out of thankfulness and not simple compliance, so when trials, tribulations, and temptations come, they will make the right decisions… which often are the hardest ones.
Deuteronomy 4:9 reads, “Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”
 
So as parents and grandparents, we are first warned to be careful and watch so we don’t forget. The strong declaration here is that we too…
-can be distracted
-can forget who and what must be first
-can take the easy way out
-can grieve the Holy Spirit
 
When this happens, the direct consequence is we affect our ability to teach our children and their children, our grandchildren. I am thankful when I am distracted (and my wife never is – wink wink), God gives me as many do-overs as it takes to get it right.
 
Do you need a do-over? God knows we can’t parent or grandparent without Him and appreciates the humility to recognize this early (or late) in our tenure as parent and grandparent. Wherever you are in this process, reach out to Him for help every step of the way. The Lord will bless you with the wisdom, endurance and courage to parent and grandparent in His ways and in His love.
 

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Foundations

As a teenager, I got into underground punk music. Friends shared it with me and we started going to concerts regularly, even booking bands to play in Dixon. It started innocently enough. I was attracted to the artists and other people of influence who attended these concerts and helped to spread the word. They sounded convincing, and their lives were clearly dedicated to practicing what they preached.
 
When punks came together, we believed that our shared angst and anger allowed us to see cultural problems clearly and because of our position as outsiders, we were willing to do more about it. Long story short, I spent years of my youth chasing a way of life that had a foundation of sand.
In Matthew 7, Jesus says:
Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand.
 
Building your house on the Rock means hearing the words of Jesus and putting them into practice.
Building your house on the sand means not practicing the words of Jesus and/or practicing the words of someone else.
 
Simply hearing or teaching the words of Jesus is not enough. We have to actually practice them and show how we put them into practice. This process is as intentional as it is personal. It’s not just “listen to me” – it’s “listen and watch me as I follow Christ”.
 
Stop for a minute and reflect on your life. What Biblical truths do you actually put into practice?
Take some time to list them. Now hold that thought.
 
All children and teens are developing their worldview right in front of us.
They’re building a home for themselves in this world and that home will either be on a foundation of rock or sand.
 
I can promise you that while this is happening, the enemy will put liars in their path, people who not only speak false ideas but actually put those ideas into practice. Their words will be relentless and their practices will be persuasive.
 
Now think of the Biblical truths you’ve put into practice. How can you share it with the next generation?
It may be the foundation necessary to fortify a soul.
 
Author: 
Phil Arellano
Youth Lead, Foundations Youth Ministry at Faith Assembly

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Lessons We Learn From Our Children

As parents we often think about all the responsibility and important life lessons we are called on by God to teach our children. While here on this earth, He has given us these wonderful blessings to teach, nurture and care for. 

All too often we get caught up in what we can teach them throughout the day, when sometimes we need to sit back and observe the things they are teaching us daily. Here are a few things I’ve observed lately, and maybe you have too: 

Childlike Faith

When you look at the life of a child, you see the unwavering faith they have in their parents. They know their parents will pick them up from school without even thinking twice. They know they are going to be caught at the end of the slide while playing at the playground. If we could only have this type of faith in our relationship with our heavenly Father…how much better would we live life unafraid! 

Matthew 18:2-3

Jesus called a little child to him, and placed the child among them.  And he said: Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

 

Worry Less

We tend to worry about something on a daily basis…

  • What will we have for dinner?
  • How am I going to pay that bill?
  • What if the load of laundry with our kid’s baseball jersey won’t be done in time for their game tonight?
  • What will that other mom think of my child’s lunch I packed while walking out the door?
All of us have stuff stress out about. While our children are young, they may not have those types of stresses in their lives, but they do remind us to stop worrying so much about the small things in life. They live life day to day without thinking about things that don’t matter.
 
While kids can rest in the care of their parents, so can we rest in the care of our heavenly Father. That issue that’s restlessly plaguing your mind? He already knows all about it, and desires for you to let Him handle it in His way and His time.
 
Philippians 4:6
Don’t worry about anything, instead, pray about everything.
 

 

Enjoying the Simple Things

When very young kids open presents, often times they end up playing more with the box than the actual toy itself. They enjoy the simple things in life: playing peek-a-boo, picking flowers outside, walking to the park, throwing a baseball. It does not take trips to Disney or shopping sprees to please them. All it takes is spending time with them to enjoy life to its fullest.  If we could only realize that life does not exist around things and more around relationships… the simple things in life, how much more would we enjoy life and not always be needing (or wanting) the next best thing.
 
Focus on what matters and practice gratefulness in the simple things every day. We are God’s children and He has given us so many simple things- and relationships- to delight in. 
 
Proverbs 15:16
Better a little with the fear of the Lord than great wealth with turmoil.
 
 
Author:
Children’s Ministry Lead at Faith Assembly

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Why I Believe in Christian Education

I believe children come from God, as a blessing.. a reward… a profound responsibility.

Children too, are a gift from Adonai; the fruit of the womb is a reward. The children born when one is young are like arrows in the hand of a warrior. How blessed is the man who has filled his quiver with them; he will not have to be embarrassed.
Psalm 127
 

A dominant and repeated theme of the scriptures is this: responsibility and authority for the children is given by God to their parents.

 
Scripture also clearly shows parents that it is their responsibility to see their children trained in the knowledge, love, fear and admonition of God and His Word. Hebrew/Jewish tradition dictates that God gave his people two assignments that can be seen in Psalms 78 and Deuteronomy 6:
 

To know, love and obey God

To pass it on to the next generation

I also believe it takes a family and the local church, in this fallen world and culture we live in, to raise Godly children.

Everyone has a world view, but the difference is where it comes from.

 
Are we adopting the world’s philosophy and actions, or are we determining that God and His Word
must define our philosophy and actions in this life?
 
 My viewpoints are not to point the finger and say everyone belongs in a Christian school or home school. This is a decision that needs to be made by parents and the Lord. No education is perfection! However, I would like to share my personal reasons for why I believe in and support Christian education.
 
 
Some of the goals and purposes of Christian education simply make them different, even spiritually healthier.
In I Corinthians 11, Paul says “Imitate me, just as I imitate Christ.”
 
They typically:
 

Partner with parents

Communicate and impart the Gospel of Christ

Teach and develop a Christian worldview

Convey, model, affirm and develop character based on Jesus character

Teach right from wrong; per Jesus example of a love for righteousness and a hatred for evil

Work to proclaim, present and live out the Gospel in every day life

Hire staff that love God and His Word, love children and feel called to teach

Honor the principle of revelation: God must be embraced as God… God first, foremost and throughout

Practice the principle of integration, educating from a Biblical and Christ-like worldview in all subjects

 

We live in a fallen world; unfriendly and even hostile to Jesus, Biblical Truth and the church.

 
Sometimes, we have earned that cynicism and dismissal through our imperfect actions. Still, our world fights against God and His Truth! We can see the evidence of this in all of our major institutions. Sadly, as a culture we are failing and falling apart. We need Jesus in every area of our lives!
 
 Christian education cannot guarantee our children will become perfect, or even great Christians. They can only endeavor to present Jesus Christ and teach from a Christian perspective. My prayer is for each parent to earnestly seek God for what is best for their individual child and family.
 
 
 
Author:
Pastor Liandro Arellano
Loving husband, father and grandfather
Retired Pastor & Superintendent of Faith Christian School
 
 
 
 

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Prayers for Our Children (With a Little Help From Paul)

Parents tend to pray for their children,
no matter what religion they may or may not profess.
I’ve met parents of dozens of different nationalities,
religions and philosophical backgrounds.
One thing we all have in common is deep concern for our children.
 
It’s interesting that somewhere along the way, it seems to be innate that our concern for them often turns to prayer for them.
It often seems it’s the God of the Bible and Christianity that parents turn to even if they haven’t had a personal history believing in Him.
 
In Ephesians 1: 15-23, Paul is praying for the Ephesian believers.
The following points warm my heart when thinking in terms of praying for our children:
That God would give them a spirit of wisdom and revelation in their knowledge of Him.
(vs. 17)
That the eyes of their hearts would be opened so that they’d know the hope of His calling of them.
(vs. 18)
That they’d know the surpassing greatness of His power toward those who believe in Him.
(vs. 19)
 
That these things are done in their lives by the same power and strength that God used to raise Jesus from the dead. (vs. 19 – 20)
 
It would seem to be a parent’s job to lay awake at night with concern for our kids.
Let me encourage you to turn those moments into praying moments.
Borrowing Paul’s prayer when we pray for our children elevates what we’re praying for them;
from the circumstances of their lives, to the condition of their lives.
 
And, perhaps God’s involvement in their lives is not a matter of mere religion,
but an actual relationship as we pray they’d come to really know Him.
 
What’s more, you may be surprised how praying this prayer will change your life as well.
After all, God knows that change starts with us. 
 
Pastor Jon is Lead Pastor at Faith Assembly

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